He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” Matthew 17:20
Hello everyone! Wow where to begin…I had to take a short break from blogging this summer, because my health decided to crap out on me, and it took a lot of my energy to find out what was going on, but I am finally recovering and ready to share what has been going on.
It all started in May when I moved home for the summer, and started experiencing what I thought were migraine headaches. One night I got really sick, and wound up in the ER the following morning. Having had a head injury at the age of 2, any type of bad head pain worries me. So in the ER they gave me some fluid, told me I had no symptoms of another brain bleed, and sent me on my way. Well that did not help much, and so I found an internal medicine doctor who diagnosed me with chronic migraines, and ordered a brain MRI. One day I was babysitting and my doctor called me at work and said that they had the MRI results back. Talk about bad timing, I didn’t want to be dealing with that at work, but I had to face it. After the MRI results came back, they saw that I had a sinus infection and asked me to come in right away. That following Monday I went into the doctor with my friend by my side, and went through the results with my doctor. I was shaking in fear when he told me that this sinus infection looked to have been there for about a year. I had no symptoms of sinus infections, so I was perplexed, but I listened to the doctor and followed up with an ENT.
July 5th rolled around, and I anxiously walked into my ENT appointment just praying he would give me answers. The doctor was very efficient, and got a CT of my head to see just what was going on. A few minutes later the CT results came back and Dr. Rivera told me that I had a chronic sinus infection, and a deviated septum. When I found out I had a deviated septum, I laughed and said “how? I have never broken my nose?” My doctor laughed back at me and said “well 15% of people are born like that so you are just special.” I continued to listen to the solutions as he listed them off to me…”steroids, and an antibiotic for 6 weeks…or surgery (which scared me).” I thought realistically and chose the surgery. I knew I was going to be scared, and that I would have to sacrifice a trip that I had planned to see my family, but I knew in the end that I had to take care of my health first. He went ahead and booked my surgery for July 19th, and let me tell you, that was the longest month of my life. Waiting for my surgery to get here was not easy. I questioned God A LOT, and was really scared up until the surgery day. I haven’t had a surgery since I was 2 so I really had no idea what to expect. I just knew that it was best for me. In order to cope with the fear that was looming over me, I started doing a bible study with Olivia. We facetime once a week and we are going through the book of Ephesians together. Focusing on God helps me to redirect my energy when I am feeling anxious. Plus having good friends like her really helped me get through this summer, I got a lot of prayers, and support from my friends through this whole thing.
The night before my surgery, I had called a few friends on the phone to help me calm my nerves. I talked to a lot of friends, and I shed a lot of tears that night thinking about what I was about to go through. I got no sleep, and got up on the 19th more nervous than I have ever been but also kind of excited because I knew I was going to feel better in the end
It was 9am, and my mom and I got in the car to go to the surgery center. We got there and I filled out some paper work, and waited what felt like forever to get called back to get prepped for my surgery. Around 9:45 they called me back, and put me in my hospital gown, and the RN, Dawn started talking to me, and asking me about college, and my life plans to distract me from the fact that I was going to be getting surgery in an hour. Nothing could distract me though, I was so focused on what was about to happen. The anesthesiologist came over to me, and told me his role in the surgery and started making jokes about how he was going to do something to get teachers pay increased. I thought that was funny, and I told him that he had three years to make that happen. My mom soon came back to say “see you later” as they were ready to take me back into the operating room. As they were rolling me back, I felt like I was in an episode of greys anatomy. There were so many doctors around me, talking in their doctor language, and asking me a ton of questions. I stayed attentive even though I was freaking out on the inside. Before I knew it, the doctor put an oxygen mask on my face…and I was out.
I woke up in recovery a little over an hour later, really confused and in a lot of pain. I remember my nurse asking me how I feel, and my mom being in my face asking me if I was awake. I tried to answer them, but I couldn’t talk, it was so hard for me to figure out how to get words to come out of my mouth. I was replying in my head, but just could not get it out. I blame it on the anesthesia. A few minutes later, I drank some water and took my first dose of pain killers, and I was talking a little bit. I don’t remember anything after that, the next thing I knew I was at home on my couch, but I don’t remember changing out of my hospital gown, or the ride home.
My recovery period was about a week-long. The first and second day were the most painful, and after that I started feeling better but still couldn’t leave my house due to the fact that I have splints in my nose. I get my splints out tomorrow (yayyyyy). I have been waiting a week to get them out, as they are annoying and painful.
I celebrated my 19th birthday recovering from surgery, but I am thankful to have had a few friends come over and visit me, and my family who I had dinner with. I did not plan on celebrating my birthday recovering from a surgery, but I had no control. I got to see all my favorite people this weekend.
If it were up to me, I wouldn’t have spent the past year in pain, but God made me walk through this past year in pain, to prove to me that I am a fighter, and will get through whatever battles He throws my way. I thought the battles were over after I lost my dad at the age of 13 but this year has proved me wrong, and showed me that these fights aren’t over, but instead I learned that I am now strong enough to get through anything. This summer has not gone as planned but I have learned a lot about myself and my faith in God. TRUST. TRUST. TRUST.
Thanks for sticking around if you read all of that… I am excited to be feeling better and able to blog weekly again!